A Home Birth Transfer: San Diego, CA

You have a plan and baby has a plan. Our hope is that both plans line up and work perfectly together.

Sometimes baby’s have other ideas, and sometimes our bodies just do unanticipated things.

False Alarm.

Brielle and Carl initially called me in the early afternoon to tell me that things were happening and that I should head to them. I had a little over an hour drive ahead of me so I knew that if things went fast, there was a possibility of missing it.

As I got about halfway to their house, Carl called me to tell me their midwife was there (who also happens to be Brielle’s best friend, oh also, Brielle is a local midwife as well) and said that it was still really early. There was no need for me to come just yet, but because of the drive, I didn’t want to drive back home in stop and go rush hour traffic just in case a switch was flipped for her.

So I drove to my mother in laws house that was a little closer and even if I needed to turn around quickly, it was easier to do so.

the call.

When Carl did call me to tell me if was time, it was about 7 pm at this point. There wasn’t much traffic on the road so it didn’t take me too long to get there. The sun was setting and by the time I reached their house in a rural part of San Diego county, it was dark.

When I entered, one of the midwives was there and Brielle was just hanging out on her birth ball in the living room. She was surrounded by her dogs and was trying to eat some dinner. Remember, eating enough during labor gives your body energy. You need AT LEAST 100 calories an hour while you’re in labor to keep up with all the energy you’re exerting.

Brielle was in good spirits. She was calm, focused, and nothing but trusting of her body.

Things were progressing beautifully. Everyone was laughing and joking. We went and hung out with her horses (yes she has horses and they’re fucking rad) all of whom were so curious as to what was going on. They could sense something was happening, and one of her mares was super protective of Brielle. She was even running off other horses and standing guard. Another one of her horses even tried to eat my camera 😂

Animals are SO intuitive! We all made our way back inside their house and settled in again. And then the hip pain really started.

the decision.

Brielle said it didn’t feel normal. It was an excruciating pain that began in her upper hip/pelvic area and just radiated all the way down her left leg. And as it progressed, it began radiating to her right leg as well.

Her midwife checked her and she was 10 cm! Woo!

But during her pushing, the pain was just getting more intense. It didn’t matter what position she pushed in, whether it was in her bed laying down, on her bed leaning up against her husband, sitting on the toilet. Nothing alleviated that damn hip pain.

After pushing for 2 hours, her midwife asked to check her to see if baby had moved down a bit. Baby hadn’t, and unbeknownst to Brielle at the time, her cervix had gone back to 9 cm. So her midwife recommended she stop pushing for a bit and try and get some rest.

Both Brielle and Carl were able to get some sleep during this down time. And when they woke, the decision was made to transfer to the hospital for some pain relief.

As their midwife (and best friend) called the hospital ahead of time to let them know Brielle was coming in, we also needed to find out the updated hospital policy on visitors since I would be going with them. The charge nurse said as long as the second visitor is fully vaccinated, they’re allowed in!

the arrival.

I ended up getting to the hospital before Brielle and Carl by a few minutes so I waited for them next to the parking garage as they parked and grabbed their items.

As they reached me, I noticed Brielle was crying. As we walked to the doors, in between surges, she kept saying “I don’t want to be here.”

And it broke my heart. Because I know for my clients who choose to birth out of a hospital setting, transferring to the hospital is the LAST thing they want to do. I know how much they’ve prepared to birth in the comfort of their home or a birth center. I know what it took to make that initial decision, to prepare not only mentally and physically, but also emotionally and spiritually.

And as much as I know it sucks, almost every time a transfer happens from an out of hospital birth, it’s what’s needed. For either the birthing person or the baby.

Settled in.

Shortly after arriving Brielle asked for an epidural, the hip pain was excruciating. She needed a break and to sleep.

Once it was in and they were all settled I left to the Suburban to take a nap myself. After a few hours I went back up to their room to check on them and they were still snuggled up and sleeping, so I quietly left their room again to head back to the suburban for more sleep.

You can never have too much sleep during a birth.

Once she was rested enough, and feeling rectal pressure (hey now 🙌🏻), the nurses checked her and she was complete (again).

Brielle started pushing a little after 10 am.

the home stretch.

She pushed for over 5 hours before her baby GIRL was born earthside (they were team green)! I rarely get emotional when baby is born, I’m more stuck in my thinking brain adjusting camera settings, paying attention to lights/medical providers/partners/etc while looking for moments to capture.

But sometimes there’s just enough of a moment, where things slow down and I’m brought back into my body. Where I’m able to really connect with the moment and the hormones, and it sinks in that a baby is being born. And I know that sounds really odd, but when you’re so stuck in professional mode of capturing someone’s birth (remember there’s no do-over), it can be difficult when it’s go-time to really soak in the moment.

But time seemed to slow down just enough as Brielle’s little girl was being born, that I was brought crashing back into my body, and I began crying with everyone.

I was so damn proud of Brielle and Carl. So damn proud of her advocating for herself, so proud of Carl and his willingness and support to do and be whatever Brielle needed at any time.

And so beyond fucking honored to have been chosen to be a part of their birth team 💕