How To Find The Birth Doula For You.
Because TRUST, there’s some shitty doulas out there.
*GASP*
Yeah I said it.
But there’s shitty OB’s, and midwives, and doctors. It doesn’t matter what profession it is, there is always going to be someone who fucking sucks. Or who you don’t like or get along with.
Finding Your Doula:
1. Energy
What does their energy feel like to you? Do you vibe? Are they a calm presence? Are they fun? Do you want a sisterly figure or more of a motherly figure?
2. what kind of support do you think you’ll need
Do you want your doula to be more hands on support or do you want them to be more vocal with reminders and your partner to be your main physical support? Sometimes partners freeze up and need a doula’s help as well and that’s ok. Any which way, your doula is part of your birth team and should be facilitating whatever the room needs (i.e. being able to read the room and understanding what is/isn’t needed in that moment). Birth is ever changing so being able to read the room and adjust is a must.
3. experience at birth setting
Have they supported clients with a similar birth plan as you? Have they attended births with your care provider or at your place of birth? Do you have a special or different situation that they may need special training?
4. training
Have they taken any doula trainings? Are they certified (they don’t need to be, but I do highly recommend an actual doula training)? Playing off the previous one, are they trained in your special situation (like VBAC, multiples, demise, etc)?
The experience in the birth setting and the training kind of play off one another and are similar because someone can be trained in something specific but may not have had hands on experience with it yet, and that’s ok. It’s just something you need to figure out whether or not you’re comfortable with.
5. do they offer multiple services you need?
Are you looking for anything else like birth photography or placenta encapsulation? Do they offer a package deal or can you receive a discount for multiple services booked? If they don’t offer anything else, is that ok with you? When covid first began, people were really looking for people who offered multiple services to minimize the people in the birth space.
6. interview multiple
This is a MUST. Don’t just settle. Interview multiple if possible. I always recommend at least 3. Three is a good number so you get multiple different personalities and experiences to see which on you vibe with the best, but you’re not overwhelmed by options and shut down.
7. inquire as early as possible
You really need to interview as soon as you’re able to. Some doula’s book out quickly, and some don’t. I’ve been hired in the first trimester, and also when they they were in early labor 😂 It just depends on their availability. But the earlier you inquire the better chance you’ll have of being able to hire the one you really connect with.
at the end of the day
There is a doula for EVERY ONE. For every income level, for every type of birth plan from a wild pregnancy and unassisted birth, to a high risk, highly medicalized pregnancy. It’s all about support. We as doula’s want you to feel seen, validated, and supported. We want your birth to be a positive experience. And we want you to find a doula that YOU feel comfortable with and connect with!
And I promise, whichever doula you choose, tell the other ones you interviewed with that you found someone you connected with and don’t leave them hanging 😉 I promise they won’t take it personally!